That's What She Said

School sucks balls .. okay not really but having to wake up before 7am is really killing me. If the class (any class, even in the afternoon) is anything even remotely close to boring (ie I have nobody to talk to) then I get really tired &just kind of drift in&out. I don't quite fall asleep but my eyelids feel like lead curtains and I've the hardest time keeping my eyes open.

I only get like 6 hours of sleep which is something I can't really remedy because I don't get tired 'til after 12am &my roommate doesn't go to bed until then. It's times like now (okay well pretty much all the time) that I wish I had a single room. My music is confined to my headphones &even though it usually sounds better through them than my speakers I really wish I could blast my music &sing at the top of my lungs whenever I want rather than only when my roommate is out of the room.

For the past couple, &by couple I mean maybe 5 hours I've been listening to She & Him's album Volume One. I've become so enamored with Zooey Deschanel's voice that I don't think I could possibly get sick of her ever. &of course she's my main lady crush, I heart her to mega pieces. I watched a couple of her performances on YouTube &she's so damn incredible. Watch!



Soooo good. <33 Favorite song on the album? Tie between "Sweet Darlin'" & "Black Hole."

Yesterday after class I went to the record store across from campus &bought the new Uh Huh Her cd Common Reaction. It's a-mazing, today was filled with non-stop Zooey but yesterday it was pure Cam&Leisha. Their mellow even kinda folksy electronic &just great. My favorite song on the album is "Wait Another Day" but "Not A Love Song" is a close second.

CAT DAVIS!!! Wednesdays are Cat Davis days, that's right, she's claimed them ... well until Bones starts then Wednesday will be Cat Davis&Bones days. So she had this biggay duo Kathryn&Amy who make up the comedy band That's What She Said. They (including Cat) did all this amazing music improvisation &pulled out some wicked (dorky) dance moves. I laughed so hard the whole time. Monday Liz Feldman had her season finale with none other than m'lady Bridget McManus as her guest. So hilarious, lots of lols there, fer srs. Those two are a-mazing together. Oh &my new word is "a-mazing" pronounced "uh mawzing" just like kitty Cat says it. I heart her.

Beatlemania concert this Friday.
Purple glue sticks are awesome.
I'm addicted to MySpace again.

kthxbye.

Oh college

So today was my first day as a sophomore &I actually missed going to class. It's amazing being on campus again &just being able to walk around all these people ... especially since walking to class I'm constantly bird watching, hey there college ladies. ;)

But anyways, I have classes with a couple people I know but didn't figure that out until class ended so next time I'll actually have somebody to sit with. Had my first meal at the dining halls, oh how I missed not having to make my own meals. I've just been nostalgic since I got here especially after seeing all my friends again.

Friday I moved in &unpacked everything then set off to visit friends. I really miss just being able to go down the hall to see them 'cause now I've either got to walk a block&ahalf or get driven over. Why did everybody decide to be all dependent? I don't understand.

I love my room &I love having my beautiful laptop here with me. I've named her now: Georgia Drew but I call her George or G.D. I named her after this character from BJ Fletcher Private Eye a web series on AfterEllen that I'm addicted too.

My roommate is really nice &she actually talks to me which I don't know if I expected that now that I think about it. I haven't been able to hang out with all my friends from last year yet but I hope to see the rest of them by the end of the week.

Mondays are my longest days of the week, out@7am &in@5:30pm, it's crazy. Physics quizzes at 7:30 in the morning? Seriously, who can do that? Tomorrow & Thurs are the same, 3 classes with two 2-hour breaks in between. Weds I've got 4 classes & Friday only 3 but I start at 9:30am which is great. Tues-Fri I end at 2:30pm which is a-mazing!

7:30's suck balls.
Uh Huh Her is fabulous.
I really wanna go to a record store.

kthxbye.

Oh Lisa <3

I have switched my favorite Veronica, it's official: I heart Lisa Origliasso.

I've always thought of her as the prettier one but I always wanted to be like Jess with her crazy tattoos and piercings and killer voice. But now I just love Lissie more, she's cuter, tinier, stronger, has a great voice &is quite funny. I also like her fashion sense a little more than Jess' now.

picture k


Isn't she just spectacular? Yea, so I haven't come up with a name for my laptop today but I watched Cat Davis' new vlog on AfterEllen and now want a car so I can name it too.

She has a blue Scion XD and calls Kevyn (y b/c it's androgynous) her "shiny blue dyke-mobile" ... why is she so a-mazing? Oh I don't know, maybe 'cause she's from Greenfield, Indiana. That's like 20 minutes south of my current location. First Indiana spits out Jill Bennett &now Cat Davis. This girl is just full of the funny, jokes at every "hard gay left turn."

Her pick-up line: "Hi my name's Cat, y'know like pussy."

Seriously, I heart her too much. &She had Eden Riegel as her first guest who's from this web series Imaginary Bitches that I think I blogged about a really long time ago. I think Monday I caught up on all the episodes, Eden is adorable &imaginary friends who are bitches, fer srs, that's great stuff.

I found a new Veronicas song that I love to pieces, it's called "Everything." I listened to the Hook Me Up album at least 5 times today. I also watched all imaginable Veronicas videos on YouTube and stalked their MySpace a little. Oh oh oh and I DVR-ed their performance on TRL, they're so fab. They looked wicked cute & Lis has this great hat that I really want.

I get to pack all tomorrow, I'm foregoing a bike ride (did one today) so I'll be inside all day. I went grocery shopping today so I've got plenty of snacks for the start of the year, dunno how long they'll last.

I heart Lissie. <33
The V-Rons are wicked rad.
Electro-pop is heaven.

kthxbye.

Technology <333

I GOT MY BABY TODAY!!

After waking up & deciding to be lazy & not go on my bike ride I took a shower. While I was standing nekkid in front of my window, which I often do and I'm trying to stop 'cause I don't have a curtain and people can see me from the street, I saw a DHL truck drive by and the driver look up at the house. After squealing 'cause I thought he saw my bday suit, I thought wouldn't it be funny if he was bringing my laptop.

&he did, fer srs kids.

He was all sign this, so I scribbled, shut the door and ran to get scissors and open the box. First thing I did was kiss it, that's right physical affection for my laptop, I hugged it too.

So after 4 hours of customization, ie copying over files, downloading programs and just making it look beautiful, my fancy little baby was all ready for use. I knew my old laptop was slow but oh my goodness, my new baby (which I'm going to name I just haven't picked out a sufficient title yet) is fast like a cheetah!! &the speakers sound amazing and it's all shiny and silver on the inside and midnight blue on top. I'm reconsidering putting stickers on it 'cause it's just so damn purty at the moment.

I have, at random periods during the day, been kissing my laptop, just above the screen @ the middle. I am just so enamored with this pretty piece of technology, I think my life is now complete .. okay not really but I'm so effin' happy right now!!

I checked out a bunch of LOLXENA's after lunch (http://lolxena.blogspot.com) so I had Xena on the brain most of the day. Maybe I should name my laptop Gabrielle ... idk, whatever. I also wrote a bit of fanfiction today ... okay it was more like fangirlreallyreallywishesitwouldhappen fiction but whatever.

I heart my laptop.
I'm starting to pack tomorrow.
I heart my laptop.

kthxbye.

I miss Bridget!

So yesterday I went on a Veronicas binge.

It all started when I watched the video for the 4th single of their new album Hook Me Up called "Take Me On The Floor" (and boy do I). But anyways they looked, well they just looked really good, and that song really makes me want to dance (and I did 'cause no one was home, very loud music oh yes) so then I went on a gallery binge at one of their fan sites while listening to their new cd on repeat (it's sinfully electropop-tastic). After that I went to their official web site and watched all the vids they've posted, little plugs for gigs and stuff on tv. Of course the whole while I was rekindling my crush on Jess, she's always been my favorite.

And I don't think I've mentioned this but I was crazy in love with these girls my junior year of high school (05-06) and went so far as to participate in Veronicas Day (the 14th day of every month after their cd release Feb. 14th), listen to the cd at least 3 times a day and of course post non-stop on their fan forum. I never did get a chance to see them in concert but I did draw their band logo on my sneakers in Sharpie.

Oh man, I just relived some amazing moments while I was writing that. I like their new album much more than the old one. I'm not usually into music that's this far into the pop genre but there's enough electronic beat and pretty faces to make the fangirl in me squee with joy. Oh and I even made a Veronicas-themed desktop, baby it's good.

PICSPAM!

Lis is fondling Jess, how sweet. Hot Australian twin sisters FTW!!

Anyways, I got all of this incredibly delicious smelling shampoo, conditioner and body wash at the store today. The body wash is cucumber melon, makes me want to lick my own skin .. it's my Axe, lol jk. I got all the rest of the stuff to re-stock my dorm but I've gotta get some food or whatever on Thurs. maybe. I wanted to buy some plain t-shirts, likes Hanes or whatever, but the ones they had had pockets, no thank you. Though I could probably pull that off. Oh, I bought silver nail polish, just 'cause I could.

Went to the State Fair again today and guess what? No, you won't get it, there were cheerleaders everywhere. And I immediately thought of Bridget McManus, the pervy high school cheerleader version that is. Then I remembered that BWB is on hiatus until September, no more Bridge to perk up my Sundays. *sadfaice* The cheerleaders where middle schoolers I think, maybe some high schoolers too? I couldn't really tell, they were all really tiny and looked pretty young. Needless to say I didn't find them very good eye candy.

I had a strawberry milkshake within 15 minutes of entering the fairgrounds (that was all waiting in line, ew). We, aka me brother sister & dad, went to see the horses, sheep, more horses, llamas and alpacas and then the bunnies <33333. So after squeeing for a good half-hour my dad & brother pried my sister and I away from the bunnies and I watched my brother fail at some games. We had pork tenderloin sandwiches for dinner then took the tractor-trailer-ride thinger around the whole fair loop. I scoped out the pretty people while my brother complained about how we were going to get back too late for him to have a friend over. We complete our loop, get a box of salt water taffy and then kick it on home. Oh and we drove in my dad's matchbox little Porche (por-shuh or how I say it, porch), that car is so fucking small.

I did some minor/major Zooey crushing before and immediately after the fair. I watched the "Why Do You Let Me Stay Here" video again and my heart skipped at 2:06 with that pretty wink. I posted it on Facebook then watched it two more times. Listened to the album twice before the fair and once after and then did just a bit of gallery checking.

I watched Rocky Horror just prior to posting this entry so I've got "The Time Warp" stuck in my head like normal. I'm thinking if I'm in shape and in the mood around Halloween I might actually dress up for the showing on campus. Fuck that movie is amazing.

I heart Zooey Deschanel.
I got an ace pair of jeans from my mom today.
Jess Origliasso is hott. (that's right two t's)

kthxbye.

Waiting on the next best thing

I came back particularly exhausted last night so I opted to skip out on my blog entry as today would provide me with enough energy to actually complete a full sentence.

So I woke up around 11am ... well actually at exactly 11am because that's what time my alarm was set to start screaming at me. I had leftovers for lunch and pretty much just lounged around my room until 3:45pm when I was picked up for an evening at the State Fair.

A quick bite of pasta salad (Italian vinaigrette, the good stuff) and some coffee cake followed quickly after the entrance to another friend's house. A phone call from a once-roommate produced the raging, door slamming, curse word slinging alter-ego of said friend. Ranting and a peculiar and awkward phone call to the new and Korean roommate cleared up some trouble but brought up some more. Bad at phone calls, good at texting. :]

So the fair grounds ... we (all 6 of us, 4girls&2boys) wander around the fair for a while checking out all the farm-related stuff first. Old-timey whatever, lots of tractors and equipment and even more pictures. I bought too much penny candy and ate it all: 25 pieces for 25cents. Played mini-golf (for free) and I jumped around a lot because of the sugar (I also sucked really hard and came in last place, yes!).

Dinner of pizza and Mountain Dew yielded to a quick stop into the 4H building to check out all the projects and gawk at bugs we didn't know and didn't want to know could be found in surrounding counties. We played in a patch of corn outside the building which resulted in screamings of "Oh my gosh look at that bug!" "It's huge!" "Gross" and then of course running out of the corn.

More pictures along the way of course.

We took a mini-quiz and won a plastic Purdue cup. Saw a giant cheese carving .. 1 lb of cheese means 10lbs of milk, yea that's right, I learned things. Then somebody lost her cell phone so we did the frantic search ... it was in the corn. Phone searching made me late to get to the Dairy Barn so I couldn't get an effin' milkshake. Lemme just tell you I was about to kill a bitch. I went to the horse barn with previously raging friend and got to pet a couple horses but most of the aisles were shut off for the night so I was even more angry. Then the bunny barn was closed so I was even more angry. But then we met up with some guy friends and watched them lose at games at the Midway and argue with all the carnies. Quite funny. I also ate more than 2/3 of a funnel cake by myself, such a bad idea.

I pulled a muscle in my hip and limped all the way back to car. I was in agony, and I had to walked down and up stairs. But sitting in the car made me feel better so by the time I got home I was feeling pretty good. Then I just konked out.

Woke up around 11:30am this morning and went for my 4mile bike ride. I managed to get back before a storm I didn't know was coming until 10 minutes after my shower it was pouring and there was plenty of lightning to go around. I watched an episode or two of House, then got online and finally posted my intro post for the rp I've been working up to for forever. The post was two pages in Word .. I got a little carried away but I'm happy I'll now have something to write about on a constant basis.

I got bored and skimmed through the five episodes of GG that I have ... I looked at all the Serena&Blair moments because I heart them together. BFFs 4ever fer srs.

Oh Oh Oh ... I got my mom to go and buy tickets for her, my sister and me for Sara Bareilles on November 1st so I'm super excited. I'm going to go through and try and clean my closet or something tomorrow, maybe start sorting things out. I'm going to go shopping to stock up on stuff this weekend with my mom so I want to start getting everything ready.

Tomorrow is Friday.
I still heart The Veronicas.
Chocolate ice cream is delicious.

kthxbye.

It Happens

Last night I went outside at midnight and watched the sky for the whole duration of The Con by Tegan and Sara (approx 37 minutes) and saw 4 shooting stars. The first one was out of the corner of my eye but the second one was right above me and my breath hitched up and I found I was smiling real wide. The other two weren't right in front of me but they were still in my line of sight. It was pretty light around my house and I really wished I could've driven to the middle of nowhere 'cause today my mom said that in the country I'd have been able to see at least a comet a minute. I was wrapped in a blanket with my headphones blasting music in my ears. Unfortunately I wasn't wearing socks so I couldn't exactly feel my toes when I got inside but it was worth it.

Got up this morning around 10:45am, ate a quick breakfast and then went for my 4 miles bike ride. Goodness, I always forget how tiring it is. I got back and I could walk pretty well and I didn't almost collapse in the shower like I've done before but I could barely walk up the stairs. Even now 12 hours later it hurt to walk up the stairs so tomorrow I'm just gonna do some easy exercises tomorrow. Velveeta mac n' cheese for lunch and a couple episodes of House in the afternoon.

Tonight was the SUGARLAND CONCERT at the State Fair!!!!!

After a giant tenderloin sandwich and some greasy cheese fries my mom and I headed up into the stands for the concert. Joe Nichols was there getting the crowd all riled up and I only knew part of one of his songs "Tequila" or something. It was pretty funny listenin' to all the women around me singing about tequila making their clothes fall off. Sugarland took about 40 minutes to set up and it was definitely worth the wait. By the time the duo on the stage it was dark out and they just had lights out the yin yang. I had an awful hard time taking pictures and the ones I did take are pretty dark because my flash set off the stage lights, I don't know it's weird.

But anyways, I love Jennifer Nettles. Proclamation of love straight out. She's got the energy of a punk band on stage and some soulful country pipes. And of course she's pretty as hell. I really liked her with long hair but her new short do is just as great. They had Storm Troopers (as in from Star Wars) posted around the stage for "security." Before Joe got off stage I saw them loitering around backstage and got really confused.

Sugarland played I think 13 songs, 2 from their first album Faster Than The Speed of Life, 5 from their second album Enjoy The Ride, 5 from their new album Love On the Inside and then "Pour Some Sugar On Me" which I thought was hilarious. At the very end of everything Jennifer and Kristian got inside these giant clear blow-up balls and "crowd surfed" or whatever. It was great.

I'm going back to the fair tomorrow with friends so it should be pretty damn fun. I want to go and see the rabbits and the horses and all the 4H stuff like I normally do. I hope everybody isn't a pain and just wants to wander or something 'cause if I don't see any animals I'm gonna kick some serious ass ... or just go wander by myself.

Now I'm listening to Sugarland quite loudly (headphones duh) and singing pretty loud. I really love Jennifer's voice, it's amazing. She's definitely my favorite country singer.

My sister got me a Snickers. <33
My neck hurts.
Tomorrow is Wednesday.

kthxbye.

Shooting stars hey hey!

A phone call at exactly 10:49am (one minute before my alarm was to go off) I received a phone call informing me that I was to be picked up at 15 after for an afternoon with my ladies. Twenty-five minutes turned into nearly forty-five as my ride forgot her wallet in our friends' car, she is ever so clever. We pick up the wallet, another friend and switch cars then we're off to the mall!

I bought a pair of brown knit slacks from Fossil (<33333333), a scarf from H&M and tube socks from Wet Seal just because I could. I split bourbon chicken with a friend for lunch that was more of a linner since it was at 3:30pm. We separate for dinner and conjoin once more around 6:45pm for another POOL PARTY!!!! Swimming for roughly an hour and three quarters then we all bumble on back home. Showering, episodes of House, book reading and too much thinking in my brain parts gets me to bed around 2am.

Today I wake up at 9:03am, 11:21am and then officially at 12:21pm. The new episode of This Just Out with Liz Feldman appears on the Internetz after my lunch of cheese and salsa quesadilla and I proceed to laugh myself silly. Liz has one half of the Canadian duo Tegan and Sara, aka Tegan, and the two are just telling joke non-stop. It's funny as hell and after my normal Internetz check-ups I watch it again followed by several episodes of House. I just got off a Tegan and Sara YouTube binge where I watched a mess of videos they made while they were producing their latest album The Con, I <3 that album. I remember last year when I was still watching tv during the day at school I found MTV U and watched their video for "Back Into Your Head" and fell in <3 with them. BTW, they're twin Canadian lesbians who currently don pretty trendy mullets. That just cracks me up.

There's supposed to be a meteor shower or summat tonight ... I think I'm going to try and go outside and look for some shooting stars. That is only if the mosquitoes decide not to ravage my apparently delicious skin. I got two bug bites on my ankle last week when I went fishing and I itched one super freakin' hard so it scabbed something awful but still itched. They're better now.

Oh ... I woke up really late so I didn't feel like biking so I just exercised in my house and my legs didn't hurt when I was showering all the gross off but when I was walking up and down the stairs later I thought I was going to collapse. I guess that means I exercised just enough. :]

Tomorrow I'm going to go for a bike ride. And maybe sort out my closet.

Chocolate milk is delectable.
Tegan Quin is HI-larious.
Dragons are cool.

kthxbye.

Olympics whar?

So my beautiful laptop cost me $913.82 ... I miss that money. I'm getting paid back for it but still. Over the summer I made approximately $1317.66 and spent every single cent, well at least I will have once my text book order goes through. The laptop is going to end up getting here right as I'm leaving for school which makes me angry. I paid an extra $39 to get it shipped in two days, but those two days are after the time it takes the factory to put together my baby.

Anyways I went to a p-p-p-pool party today! And I didn't get sunburned!!! It was the normal girls and some guys that they play frisbee with and it was an all out ball brawl (ie we threw balls at each other) for at least the first hour and a half. Every time I threw a ball however I kind of fell out of my top which was damn uncomfortable but I won't likely be wearing my suit again this year except for tomorrow after shopping with my girlies. I don't really know what I'm going to buy, I'll prolly head into Buckle to buy a few tank tops but I don't really feel like spending the rest of my money. I've got about $60 of cash and I think that's all I'll be spending.

The other day while I was discussing why I wanted to work in the libraries at school I said that I loved old books and the smell of them so when my mom went to the Goodwill Outlet today she brought back these two books for me, one from 1946 and the other from 1899!!! The one from 1899 had a newspaper article in it about the guy who the book is based on ... and of course they both smell just fabulous and look awesome.

I watched the new Harry Potter trailer and then proceeded to re-read Luna Lovegood's biography because she is my favorite HP character, in a close second is Hermoine. After that I watched She & Him's new music video for "Why Do You Let Me Stay Here?" and was reduced to slack-jawed awe as Zooey winked at the camera. I <3 her ... & now I'm listening to the cd and singing along very quietly because I love her voice. I think I need to send away for her autograph or something so I can frame it and have it forever.

I love women's sand volleyball.
Gymnasts have scary muscles.
Phelps already won a gold.

kthxbye.

Can you go another round?

Wednesday's blog was the 69th post. I just thought I should announce that ... be a perv and laugh.

So how did I spend 8.8.08 you ask?

Pretty much like every other day. I woke up at 12:21pm, had leftovers for lunch and lounged in front of my computer for a couple hours. I decided to be active around 2:30pm so I jogged 15 mins on the eliptical, I only did a mile and a quarter but I was sweating like none other because I didn't have my fan on nor my window open. Being the only room on the second floor means I get all the heat! Super fun let me tell you. I did some crunches, pumped some iron (20 repetitions is barely pumping but whatever) then took an incredibly cold shower.

Went back to my computer and watched my favorite Pam Beesly episode, ie The Dundies where Pam gets plastered at Chili's. The Whitest Sneakers Award, good for Pam. Oh yea and then there was that first Jam/PB&J kiss. I <3 Jim Halpert.

For some reason .. aka I just found out about this new film poking fun at 50s sexploitation B films called Bitch Slap! ... I wanted to watch Grindhouse, so I did. I only have the Planet Terror half though, but it was still good and I still shudder when Dr. Block pops the boil or whatever on that guy's tongue and when Dakota breaks her wrist in the door.

More Internet surfing produced nothing much at all. I saw the world premiere of Morningwood's new video for their new song "Sugarbaby" on FNMTV on MTV and watched like three seconds of the Olympics opening ceremonies. Like it says on my Facebook: Emma prefers slutty puppets to olympic games. I went on Morningwood's MySpace and watched the last in a series of Blog Mitzvah's where Chantal (the lead singer) and her husband Jimmy (not in the band at all) answer questions from fans. They are so fucking hilarious together. Especially when Chantal called some girl a bitch at least 30 times.

I needed a picture for a character I'm working up and decided to use Jemina Pearl, the lead singer of Be Your Own Pet, so I spent a good hour looking through trillions of pics of her and the band.

Yesterday was my last day or work, it was boring as hell, I'm glad to be done. I had to write a thank you e-mail to my boss today though. I think he talked to me directly only two times the whole summer (and I was sitting right outside of his office).

My text books for school cost $497.82. I'm going to try and order my laptop from Dell tomorrow. It's an Inspiron 1420 in Midnight Blue, my dad just has to confirm that he likes it considering he and my mom are paying me back for it separately.

My closet is a mess.
Two weeks until I move back to school.
Oyster crackers are delicious.

kthxbye.

I count all the stars in space

For the past three and a half hours I have been quite heavily submersed in the most magical love story I have ever read.

My head is now high in the clouds and my room is filled with sighs long past yet I feel downtrodden. My heart is reaching out, grasping at nothing but thin air and I am saddened, deeply and thoroughly. It's stories that evoke such precious emotion that make me reflect, make me think upon myself and the life I have yet to live.

Help is non-existent in the lilting phrases and gentle honey caress of Norah Jones whispering from my speakers.

The dark of night holds only the solace of my mind and thoughts buried deep during the light of day. It isn't safe alone in my room when the house is quiet and my mind is screaming, struggling against subconscious restraints. It's never safe.

I wish only to love and be loved, to care and be cared for. A wish the stars ignore having grown weary of the constant need of the human race. The stars hold no hope for me.

"As long as the day is full of time there will always be room for your hand in mine." Fall Apart Again by Brandi Carlile

It's a night of reflection

Eating oyster crackers makes me feel like a 2-year-old. I can't decide if that's a good thing.

I was once told, by a good friend, that I'd never have kids. She could never see me having kids, and it hurt at the time to hear her say that but it's something I've come to understand over time. I love kids sure, I love other people's kids 'cause I don't have to take them home. I love my little brother but I have no patience when it comes to teaching him anything. I just expect him to understand what I'm talking about with little to no explanation. It could be different with my own children, but you never know.

They say you're the product of your surroundings. If I grew up in Indiana I think I'd be fucked up. There are things I think about late at night: if I didn't move to Indiana what would I have been like? Would I have the same personality, would I like the same things, would I do the same things?

Sometimes I get this twitch in my bottom right eyelid. My mom says it's from stress and then she tries to pry out my thoughts, tries to get me to talk about whatever it is that doesn't allow me to go to sleep when I get in bed. I don't talk, I never do.

Sometimes I cry because I hate myself. It's not a volatile, pain-inflicting hate, it's a hate filled with criticism for faults and appearances and lack of courage. It's one of those things that keeps me up late at night. One of those things that makes me feel like I need a psychiatrist, or a friend to pour my heart out to, or a blog to say whatever the fuck I want.

Nobody reads this. Sometimes I think it's a good thing. I've got false courage when my voice isn't projecting, when it's just my thoughts in a visual stream of words. But sometimes I want to write things, want to get things off my chest, but I'm afraid that people will read, that people will criticize, they'll laugh, they'll mock, they'll shy away, run away.

Sometimes I try to make some newly-found aspects of myself blatantly obvious, yet people ignore them. Or at least they don't care enough to acknowledge that something big has happened to me this summer. That something profound has occurred.

I like going out in crowds. I like watching people. I like lust at first sight. I like smiling at strangers. I like meeting new people. I like hustle. I like bustle. I like noise. I like confusion.

I love gummi worms
& mystery novels
& the shuffle function on my iTunes.

kthxbye.

V-hole, say what?

I was actually kept pretty darn busy at work today which amazed me as I've been short of things to do for at least the past two weeks. In the morning I was doing a bunch of little stuff for my mom and a little (ie 10 mins worth) of database checking then we were off to a meeting a lunch downtown at The City Market. They're have a fundraiser dinner/party thinger for People Helping People who are feeding children in El Salvador and the president (of El Salvador), his wife is coming for the even so they were just planning all during the meeting. Our store has a kitchen in the Market (I don't remember if I've mentioned that before) so our chefs are going to cook out there for a little bit, serve little appetizers and stuff.

My mom and I had lunch from this Italian place, I had some really good pasta salad and she had chicken salad, we both had pieces of a baguette. I got this really good drink from Naked (that's the company name kids) and it was this really thick almost smoothie like strawberry-banana concoction. Delicious.

Went back to work and got started on some binders for the builders. Spent the rest of the day printing and sleeving and putting together the binders. I was working as slowly as I could but I still managed to finish by the end of the day. Hopefully my mom will have something for me to do tomorrow.

Came home and jumped on the Internets. Did my normal checking around and watched the newest episode of This Just Out with Liz Feldman. So, she's awesome, she crashed the Pride parade in San Fransisco (ie she marched with whoever she wanted) and she even hijacked a float, and by hijacked I mean she got a girl to let her sit on the float with her. And, of course, all the while she was waving her Disneyy Gay Sword. To quote Liz: "By the power of Gay Sword!" She had Melanie Lynskey on who is the sweetest New Zealander ever in the universe. Liz was trying to get her to have a cursing throw-down and Melanie could barely manage four curse words. It was hilarious.

I watched two episodes of The Office and a couple episodes of The Whitest Kids You Know 'cause I felt like laughing some more. Had some super extra freakin' delicious pizza for dinner and then surfed the Internets again.

I only have two more days of work left. I have to go to the doctor in the morning to get my last Guardasil shot which is overdue by like 2 months I think, lol. My mom procrastinates just as much as I do! I was going to watch Rocky Horror but I think I'm just going to read instead since I have to get up early. I still <3 books.

Chocolate ice cream is delicious.
My cats hate when I hug them after a shower.
My back hurts.

kthxbye.

I'm becoming a book collector

Nearly 18 days 'til I'm back at school. I'm starting to become terribly impatient.

Friday I slept in until almost 1pm. It was amazing. My sunburn ached and my ears were still ringing but I felt incredibly refreshed. The Internet held me captive until near 6:30pm when Girl's Night kicked into gear. We (ie me and four friends) went to a aint your own pottery place and proceeded to ... well paint our own pottery. I painted a mug but I didn't have much of an idea of what to paint when I got there so I just picked some pretty colors and did whatever, and wrote my name too. We ate a very late dinner at Appleby's and I had Three Cheese Chicken Penne, soooo GOOD.

When I got home (around 11) I wasn't all that tired. The Internet took me captive again, doing what I really can't remember, until 2am when I settled into my book. I finished it by 3:10am and pretty much just straight konked out as soon as the lights were out.

Woke up Saturday morning at 11 and went to the new Goodwill outlet. It's basically just bins of stuff you shift through. I bought 4 books, 3 were 25cents and the fourth was 50cents. I'm awesome.

The Robber Bride by Margaret Atwood
Girl With A Pearl Earing by Tracy Chevalier
The Virgin Blue by Tracy Chevalier
The Raw Shark Texts by Steven Hall

I <3 books.

Went to Target and I bought a new button down grey shirt (amazing) then went to Office Depot to get school supplies for everybody. When I got home I was in an organizing mood so I got all my school supplies collected up and they're now sitting in a box and a container next to my desk. At 7:10pm a friend came and picked me up and we went to see the new Mummy movie and let me tell you, piece of crap.

It was corny as hell, there was too much CGI, Rachel Weisz wasn't in it. That last one was what really got me. There was some pretty good action and Brendan Fraser is pretty funny but they didn't have the real Evey so I was like feck that shat betch. We got some ice cream at Coldstone (french vanilla and heath pieces <33) and just talked about a lot of stuff. One of the girl's I went with used to live in Indiana but moved to Arizona and then her family moved back to Indiana but she goes to college in Arizona (yea) so she talked about school there. They have an tunnel system under their campus and they go spelunking on the weekends. I wish I had something that cool to do on my campus.

Today I slept in until 12:30pm, I have no reason why. Nobody really bothered to wake me up. Internets, House MD and more Internets. I went fishing in the local park and was the first and only one in the family to catch a fish. A cute little bluegill, don't worry we let him go. It was hot as balls out so we left after an hour and came home to eat dinner. I watched another episode of House MD and finally put my Warped Tour pictures on Facebook. Oh oh oh, I re-watched the whole first season of BJ Fletcher Private Eye, I really need a "Lock and Load" tee shirt. I also watched the new Brunch with Bridget and laughed so hard because Cathy Shim was on!! I <3 her ... she got Bridget half-naked ... mind you the naked was behind a Chinese fan but still.

Over the past three days I listened to TAT's EP 23 times. It's only 16 minutes long but seriously, that's kind of bad even for me considering it's only 5 songs, so now I'm on shuffle. It's been pretty kind so far.

Tomorrow I have to leave the house by 8am so my mom and I can leave early, for what reason I have no idea. Three more days of work <33.

Tatiana DeMaria, I still <3 you.
Coldplay is freakin' awesome.
I have lots of books.

kthxbye.